ISpyShanghai

I’m sat in the airport wearing my heaviest possible clothes with the baggage receipts for 9 (nine) suitcases weighing down the boarding pass. Leaving on a jet plane to old London town (and then Manchester).

That’s right- this is the final blog entry for ISpyShanghai, your favourite Shanghai based Ukulele blog about shoes (well, top 10 anyway).

Because I’ve got a girlfriend now, this move was actually pretty organised; we left the house yesterday and slept in the airport hotel.

As you might expect though from a man who thinks 3D pictures of cats are a great purchase the house was completely filled with tat that we couldn’t take with us.

In the end we gave away so much stuff to the neighbourhood recycling chaps (i.e. the ones who pedal around streets ringing a bell, looking for scrap cardboard) that a queue formed outside the back door. At one point- and this is true- there were so many people fighting over our left-over salt and half broken badminton rackets, that a guy set up shop selling roast potatoes to the crowd.

Anyway we got it done, paid the excess baggage (one million dollars) and take off in about half an hour.

Thank you, goodbye and Merry Christmas Shanghai- it’s been a blast.

Jamma out

Normally I do my software engineering seated on a Chaise Lounge, dressed in a fine linen suit, sipping on private stock. This week though, we’re testing on site so it’s all a bit different.

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Toilet signs from the bit between Pudong airport T1 and the Maglev station.

Sit

Squat

Two things here-

1) Is it still OK to find this funny? I’m 31 for flip’s sake.

2) In the girls toilet, does the stick figure wear a skirt?

Outside the Airport area's Post Office

This guy is one of the cowboy taxis (山寨出租车?) that ferry people around the airport area- they’re shady fellas these, would steal the moustache right off your face.

Here’s my round up of the year. 

jANUARY

I started off the year in in Letterkenny, Oirland where I was pitched up in a remote cottage following my brothers wedding.

It was great craic (fake irishmen: please note the spelling) although if you want to get a Chicken Tikka Masala at 3am on January the 1st, I’d recommend not being in a village of 250 toothless fishermen. 

On returning to Shanghai, Emma convinced me to take a trip to the freezing wastelands of Harbin where they brighten the place up once a year by holding an ice festival. 

“How cold was it James?” 

I hear you ask. So cold that there was frost on the end of my eyelashes. 

So cold that when I saw a man peeing in the street, I wanted to shake his (left) hand for bravery.

Very, very, cold.

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Every month or so in my office, we abandon the staff canteen and go out to a restaurant together for lunch.

Since there is nothing of interest in the area around the airport (in fact it was all water a few years ago), we drive to a town nearby called Chuansha. 

The main tourist attraction in Chuansha is a place where you can buy train tickets. It’s not exactly buzzing. However they do have a very cool “farmer style” restaurant.

Farmers like to eat

  
I’m not sure why they call it “Farmer style”- maybe it’s because everyone in there stares at foreigners, just like a farmer.

The food itself was presented as a kind of buffet- except you ordered what you wanted as a woman followed you round with a notepad, and then the dishes were delivered to the table. 

They had enormous bubbling pots of soup filled with pigs heads, a kind of fried pastry desert that was the size of a football, a genuine Indian guy cooking Paratha, and charge 18RMB for a kind of Crab that you pay 150RMB for on The Bund (I know, I paid it a few weeks ago).

Tasted like a fried yorkshire pudding

There are constant rumours that Disney are going to build one of their massive theme parks in this town. It’s a good idea as far as I can see- the place is handy for the Maglev, and no-one is going to miss such cultural treasures as the Scrap Metal Alley, or Construction Worker Shanty Town.

No doubt the price of Crabs will shoot up, but that’s a price that I think is worth paying.

KAP- Kite Aerial Photography is where you attach a camera to a kite, hoist the thing up in the air, and then take photos of the lovely scenery down below.

Sounds cool doesn’t it? I’ve been determined to have a go for a while.

First of all I bought a kite from Decathlon- a double string stunt kite, because that’s all they had, but it seemed sturdy and fairly light weight.

Then I cut a hole (for the lens) in an old camera case and attached it to the bar of the kite. Secured the bottom of the case to the back bar with plastic ties, checked everything was OK, and waited for a sunny day.

Click for more detail, it's pretty securely attached

The whole kite

Complete with camera

Sunday was a beautifully clear day, I went down to the Science & Technology museum to try out my kit.

Click below to see stunning photos taken from a kite soaring high above Pudong!

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Last night I worked until 5am PROTECTING YOUR AIRPORT (I’m kind of a modern-day Spiderman) so am resting at home right now.

Woken from my slumbers this morning by the intercom being rang over and over again, I picked up the little phone and asked the guy at the gate what he wanted:

Food delivery
It’s not mine
Food delivery
I didn’t order!
Food delivery
But I didn’t..!

No matter, the security guard helpfully buzzed him in.

As the elevator made its way up to my floor my mind was racing:

Why aren’t Chinese security guards forced to watch “Leon” in basic training?
Can I physically overpower a 15 year old manchild in my dressing gown?
If I manager to batter him to death and throw him down the stairwell (oh that’s right, I know some moves!) will he actually have food in his bag? Would it be wrong to eat it?

Turns out he had the wrong address, and now I’m really hungry.

 
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