ISpyShanghai

After seeing this enormous bag of corn puffs outside Zhongshan Park I had a hankering for some sweet maize goodness.

Not for me the regular cheese dusted route though, that’s for squares, I was pushing new boundaries with a strawberry eclair flavoured thing that I picked up at the Supermarket. Errr, yeah!
 

When I opened the bag the smell was delicious- like the fancy-dan strawberry and almond cereal I get from Marks & Spencers- and the first one or two were actually pretty tasty.

They’re sweet, crunchy and whatever chemical they douse them in definitely tastes of strawberries. 

Sadly though, the weird pink stuff that’s smeared on the top forms a film on the roof of your mouth, and the whole thing made my tongue start fizzing in an unpleasant way 1/3 down the bag.

It reminded me of the Simpsons scene where Bart is testing a new brand of Cola; “Pleasing taste, some monsterism”.

Up next week: Lemonade flavour hot dogs.

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Martina Navratilova

I spotted tennis legend Martina Navratilova outside Zhongshan Park at the weekend.

Tried to talk to her but she didn’t want to know, typical.

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I tell you what we haven’t had for a while, SHOE BAGS!

Here are a couple from some Nigerian fashion blog called Bella Najia. Apparently these things are big on the streets of –insert the name of a town in Nigeria here–.

One of these women is in "Desperate Housewives". I think it's the one on the bottom right.

And from my own eagle eye- here are a couple of horrors from Bangkok.

Forget Swine Flu, the next global pandemic is Shoebag Fever*!

There’s a small shopping arcade for losers next to Jing-An Temple. I went there on Saturday.

It’s called Comic Plaza or some such thing, so I was expecting it to be full of awkward teenage boys completing their Power Rangers collection instead of shaving off their wispy upper-lip hair and getting some sunlight. Whilst there was a little of that- there was also a bunch of stuff I just did not understand at all.

After about an hour in there, I felt confused, disorientated and out of my depth- just like those teenage boys probably feel when staring at the ground in front of an attractive woman.

Most of the stuff didn’t even seem to be aimed at boys- there were lots of weird clothes that Avril Lavigne might wear if she was a prostitute, key rings that look like sushi, perverted toilet signs, and comic books where one Japanese schoolboy forces himself on another.

I think it's called "When lunch money isn't enough"

Who can possibly need a passport cover that says “Prince of Tennis” on it?

Why is Tim Burton’s “A Nightmare Before Christmas” still culturally relevant?

When would I ever want to listen to a CD featuring the music from Final Fantasy VI?

I was tempted for 35RMB, but not sure what it really says about me

Presumably it all makes a lot more sense if you’re full of teenage hormones, hate your teachers, and are convinced that your parents spend all day long thinking of ways to make your life miserable.

The plan was to pick up a few quirky model robots for my nephew, instead I ended up with a headache and a sour taste in my mouth. Oh and a cute purse for my niece.

Seaweed monsters: Not for sale

Weirdo Arcade For Misfits- 1856 Nanjing Lu, near Changshu Lu

To find out more about this place- read what Morgan at Smart Shanghai thought.

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Shanghai’s only professional football team is called Shanghai Shenhua FC. They play in the Chinese domestic league at Hongkou stadium, and I went to see them last Friday.

Getting a ticket is pretty easy- you come out of the subway station (lines 3 and 8 go straight there) and get jumped on by scores of guys trying to sell them to you. I’d been told that the golden rule is never to pay more than 40RMB so the conversation went like this:

Me: How much for a ticket?
Him: One million dollars
Me: Hmm I heard it was normally 30RMB for one ticket
Him: Oh you’re very skilful! OK- 30RMB.

It’s a buyer’s market since the stadium is huge and only 1/4 full for most games.

Buying a ticket outside like that means you don’t get to sit (well, stand) with the hardcore fans in the season ticket holders area behind both goals, banging drums and waving flags for the whole game. You also can’t sit in your seat and drink beer, although they do sell it and you can stand at the back and still see the game whilst you drink and hang out with the security guards.

The guards were great actually- they let people smoke in the stadium but only if you give them one. They get loads of cigarettes this way, so they keep the spare ones under their hat.

Ways that watching football in Shanghai differs from in the UK:

• The club shop sold scarves, badges and shirts from other football teams. 
• One fan had a flag with a picture of Che Guevara and the word “BOYS” written underneath it
• The manager went to the club shop at half time to sign autographs 
  (well, Shenhua were 2-0 up by then so I guess there was no point in giving a team talk)
• You can buy the ticket, three beers, and a chicken burger and have change from 100RMB

You can just about see Che Guevera on the flag

Shenhua beat Shenzhen 4-1, in fact they’re having a great start to the season so far.

If you’re interested in going (and you should be cos it’s ace) then there’s is a good Facebook page here: Shanghai Shenhua FC Supporters

The next 5 home games are:

Sunday, 10 May 2009 19:45
Shanghai Shenhua v Qingdao

Tuesday, 19 May 2009 20:00
Shanghai Shenhua v Kashima Antlers

Saturday, 20 June 2009 19:45
Shanghai Shenhua v Dalian

Thursday, 2 July 2009 19:45
Shanghai Shenhua v Chongqing

Saturday, 8 August 2009 19:45
Shanghai Shenhua v Chengdu Blades

All home games are at the Hongkou stadium- a 25RMB taxi ride out of town, with metro stations on lines 3 and 8.
http://www.exploreshanghai.com/metro/pedia/station/hongkou-football-stadium
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I think Emma finds these little Ukulele videos horribly embarrassing you know- she refused to watch the Radiohead one (although to be fair she was sat 5m away when I made it, so why would she bother?) and curled up into a little ball whenever I mentioned doing another one.

God knows how she would have coped if she went out with me when I was 17 and doing gigs with my two awesome bands.
Not well I should imagine.

Admittedly they’re not great videos- there is no moment where you realise that the ugly lump with the bushy eyebrows can sing like an angel, a cat doesn’t run into the wall behind me, and nobody takes their top off. But hey, at least they’re short.

What I really need to get working on is a timelapse photography movie of some shoes, with a ukulele sound track. Then we’d be cooking with three kinds of heat.

Although Shanghai has plenty of antique shops (which all seem to sell suspiciously similar items), I’d never seen a proper junk shop until Saturday.

Right next to Cotton’s on 604-608 Jianguo Xi Lu (near enough An Ting Lu as makes no difference), there’s a place full of office furniture, desks, chairs, old PCs, rubber jumpsuits, and all sorts of cool bric-a-brac.

The anitquey type stuff was reasonably priced (that saxophone was a little over 1,000RMB) and the furniture was cheap. They’ve got a website at Sh2buy.com

I had a look at an old Leica camera and still fail to see why they cost so much, toyed with the idea of getting an Accordion, then walked out with nothing.

You might have better luck than me- especially if you’re in the market for a second hand pipe.

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Many thanks for Svenja Reimers who sent in these beauties all the way from Suzhou.

You could stick a pin in this photo and hit good shoes. I also love the

“What the hell are they taking a photo of?”

look on the lady’s face, far right. I’m glad it’s not just me who gets that look.

However, the boots take the cake. Let’s take a closer look at what’s going on there.

It’s not easy to tell at first, but the extreme closeup reveals a boot that somehow has a collar, multi-coloured stockings, and a pair of stripey cycle shorts.

Must still be pretty cold in Suzhou.

Thanks again Svenja!

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