This morning I was enjoying a healthy balanced breakfast of bottom-of-the-bag Coco Pops dust, when Emma asked me to hold Lambert & Miss Julie whilst she changed their water.

“No chance”

says I

“It’s unhygienic. And besides, if I try to hold them both at the same time, I’ll end up with a handful of green mush”

Instead she put them in a high sided bowl and rinsed off their little pied a flipper while I supervised.


Lambert, with those “Come to bowl” eyes

Their home thoroughly free of turtle crap and tapwater (Flora told us that tapwater is Turtle kryponite), she put them back to bed and I sat down to put my shoes on.

“Nooooo!”

I hear from the kitchen- it’s Emma, she’s put her Weetabix in the dirty bowl where the turtles were just sitting.

It’s the last two in the packet, we’ve no other food in the house. She has to eat them.

No harm done. They were, apparently, turtlicious and if I may say- Emma’s shell is looking shinier than ever.