Published by Swiss James on 13 Dec 2007
“But I always sit around in my y-fronts at home, I was just trying it out”
In Westgate Mall right now (that’s the one just east of Citic Square on Nanjing Road shopping centre fans) Panasonic have a big demonstration of their massage chairs all set out.
If you imagine me in this chair, with a little drool coming out of my mouth- well that’s how it looked.
I was in there the other day buying fabulous gifts for Emma (OK OK, trying on ear-rings) when I saw tired shoppers sitting in these things, kicking off their shoes and generally making an exhibition of themselves. My initial thought was that these people had no shame, parading their socks in public for everyone to see, but then I figured what the hell, you’re only hungover 3 times a week- and tried one out.
Mercy mercy, mercy me- as soon as I turned the thing on it began to grip my legs in a leather upholstered hug, and emit waves of pleasure up and down my spine. For 20 minutes I lay in that chair, ignoring the stares of other shoppers and the requests from the demonstration staff to keep my voice down.
From the brochure- can your chair do soft shiatsu?
Basically if this thing could cook Lemon Meringue pie, I’d be looking into some kind of civil ceremony, and me and Mrs Comfortizer 95011 (with heated seat option) would be very, very happy together.