Brace yourselves for some rather unpleasant news, I was pickpocketed at the weekend. Now I enjoyed “Oliver Twist” as much as the next man, but in real life the whole thing isn’t half as much fun. Picture the scene, you’re a handsome gentleman in his mid to late 20s (alright then, 29) and you’re having trouble getting a taxi on the mean streets of Shanghai. It’s always like this when it rains, and the area I was in (between Huaihai Lu and People’s Square) is a blackspot for picking up a cab.

Racing through crowds, fighting other potential passengers, when suddenly you notice an unbearable lightness about your person. And that was that, no sign of a fast-footed street urchin, no shifty men lurking in corners- it was there, and then it wasn’t- wallet and phone both gone.

Beware! Urchin!

The silver lining in this tragedy is that I’ve gotten lots of great advice off people ever since it happened: apparently the pocket (outer, jacket) I was carrying my stuff in was all wrong, the exact spot (overpass next to Nanjing Road, suspiciously close to where WoAi works…) where I was robbed is a terrible den of thieves, this time of year (just before the new year when migrant workers want to go home) is particularly dangerous and nobody should carry over 1,000RMB in cash on them (because, well, just because).

All very valuable information, and just what I wanted to hear.