Published by Swiss James on 22 Aug 2007 at 11:58 am
Summer socks
Despite all Craig’s warnings to the contrary:
“Oh you won’t be able to cope with the summer here James it’s like Dante’s inferno with noodles”
“It’s so hot in August, when you open your mouth, steam comes out”
“Last year I ran out of water so had to cut open a dog and shower in its blood” etc. etc.
I actually find the summer in Shanghai to be pretty bearable, even pleasant.
Yes you have to change your shirt 8 times a day, but then one’s Ayi takes care of one’s laundry so that’s not a problem. And yes, I take 5 showers a day, but my hair is so short that I’m in and out of there like an Iraqi snatch-squad. Thus far at least, I’ve managed to avoid joining the throngs of men who walk the streets shirtless, and have resisted the Shanghainese urge to cool off by rolling my vest up to my nipples, and trousers up to my knees.
In fact I’m so immune to the heat that I’ve managed to keep on wearing normal socks instead of the horrendous, transparent, nylon ’summer socks’ that my workmates wear.
Ryan insists that these are definitely not just a trimmed down pair of his wife’s stockings, nor did he buy them from a specialist Transvestite shop. Not only that, he had the gall to suggest that in China, wearing normal socks all the year round would mark me out as a poor peasant who can’t afford two kinds of socks. The cheeky swine.
he does kind of have a point . . . =)
just got back from wyoming and lemme tell ya, this heat and humidity in texas took some getting used to again. don’t wanna imagine what it’s like in shanghai.
Angie, imagine if you were small enough to fit inside a very fat sweaty mans’ armpit who was out jogging on a really hot day, that’s how James tells me he likes to imagine it.
I still can’t believe how vain some of the Chinese men are, back in the UK there was always someones mum that liked to keep the plastic covering on the settee for years to stop it getting it dirty, but who’s this guy in the photograph that’s still keeping his shoes in the plastic bag? Whatever next!
Dingle are you saying you haven’t covered your tv remote in cling film and kept the protective film on your mobile phone?
I definitely have to et me some of them nylons - stylin’!
Cling film is for girls, I cover everything in aluminium foil
Craig / dingle- I think maybe if you took my lead and invested in a nice crisp linen suit you’d be more comfortable. Although I suppose once you wrapped it in tinfoil, you might not feel the benefit.
If you saw how filthy that floor is, you’d cover your shoes too- it’s like the Somme, except with a carpet.
I actually miss that humid summer. The safety net of not knowing whether the pool you wake up in is sweat or pee pee - oh for that luxury here in grey, cold England! Enjoy.
Unless the aircon has broken, it’s usually pee (or puke)!
Almost certainly vomit if Matt’s stopping over.
Mmmmm, can’t stop thinking about Iraqi snatch…