The Peak District is an English National Park with everything you could possibly want: beautiful limestone scenery, Sheep farming, traditional dry stone walls, the unmarked shallow graves of child murderees, nice tea shops, pubs where everyone stops talking and stares at you when you walk in- everything.

The Peak District

For a few years now, me and a few friends have very much enjoyed renting out an old barn in the Peak District for the weekend.
It’s a bit like going camping, except you don’t have to tool around with canvas and driving pegs into sodden turf whilst horizontal driving rain lashes at your wind-cheater. They (usually) have electricity, lights, (sometimes) running water and most importantly- you can’t break anything in them no matter how drunk you are. 

The first time I ever went to a barn was back in 2001. It was February, and no-one could find the place in the Wintry darkness for about 2 hours. When we eventually got there it was so cold that your lips stuck to the cans of lager if you didn’t drink them quickly (we presumed), and everyone had to huddle around the CD player for warmth. It was a good enough night, swapping stories, wondering whether these new “Spicy Girls” were just a one hit wonder etc. until at some point a song came on the CD player (”Everybody Needs A 303″ by Fatboy Slim) and everyone just flipped over the edge and went ballistic.

Steven Glass is a legend
This isn’t a photo from that first barn, as no-one had cameras back in those bygone years.

We were swinging off the wooden rafters in the roof of the barn, dancing on the old tables and chairs, freestyling a bit of old-skool rap (honestly). A mate video taped some of it, but every time I ask to watch, he shakes his head and refuses, on the grounds that “It just doesn’t make sense”

Anyway, that’s what I’m doing tonight. Getting drunk in a barn.